. . .

usually i wait until i have something profound to say... or my insides burst with exasperation.... or i should be studying but my brain can handle no more until it spews somehow whatever is jamming it up. usually i wait to blog until that time. but, alas...i have nothing profound to say and my insides aren't bursting from exasperation...which, i suppose is blog worthy in and of itself.

peace. that's what i finally feel. some people say time is needed to get over things. i say...no. God is needed. and, sometimes we must wait until God moves...but, it's not time that heals. it is God. i don't think 'healing' means perfection either. but, perhaps a realistic outlook. sometimes there is complete healing...but, have you ever seen someone who has broken a finger? it may no longer be broken...but the crookedness of the finger reveals the pain suffered in the past. sometimes these scars are more visible....like, the older adult whose face is scattered with craters which painfully reveal the battles undergone during puberty. time healed those wounds. the finger is no longer black and blue...the face is no longer covered in red, oily, bumpy patches. but...the remenants remain. one look in the mirror or at the hand could spin one back into the different painful experiences....even though they are far away now. but...they are sort of battle scars. evidence that despite a rough adolesence....one can overcome and be the life of the party. despite lacking hand-eye coordination one can come back and play sports again. it proves that they weren't beaten.... it wasn't really time that healed them. it was the acceptance of the real hurt and pain...and the step forward which they took.

i don't like hugs much...but...check it:

Pakistan’s woman tourism minister tendered her resignation today after hardline Islamic clerics accused her of obscenity for hugging her instructor after a charity parachute jump.

Nilofar Bakhtiar, the Federal Minister for Tourism, was pictured wearing a brightly coloured jumpsuit and hugging her instructor after a tandem jump to raise money for child victims of the earthquake that struck Pakistan in October 2005.

The images provoked the wrath of clerics in Islamabad, who accused Bakhtiar of posing in an obscene manner and violating the Islamic moral norms.

A religious court set up by the clerics at a radical mosque in Islamabad issued a fatwa, or religious edict, against Bakhtiar when the photographs first appeared in local newspapers last month.

They urged the government to punish her and fire her from the Cabinet. Bakhtiar failed to win the support of Cabinet colleagues and the government appeared to cave in to the demands of the militants.

As she announced her intention to resign today, Bakhtiar complained of a campaign of intimidation against her.

do you keep up on the news? if not...check it.

Taliban Tells Pakistani Christians: Convert or Die

Thursday , May 17, 2007

ISLAMABAD, Pakistan —

Christians in a Pakistani town beset by pro-Taliban militants sought government protection Wednesday, the eve of a deadline for them to convert to Islam or face violence.

About 500 Pakistani Christians in Charsadda, a town in the North West Frontier Province bordering Afghanistan, received letters earlier this month telling them to close their churches and convert by Thursday or be the target of "bomb explosions."

Several Christians, a tiny minority in the predominantly Muslim country, have fled town and others are living in fear, community leaders said.

Some complained that police were not taking the threat seriously.

"Police say someone is joking with us by writing these letters," Chaudhry Salim, a Charsadda Christian leader, said during a news conference in Islamabad. "They have deployed only two policemen at our churches ... this is the kind of security we are getting now."

Shahbaz Bhatti, a prominent Christian leader and head of the All Pakistan Minorities Alliance, said the provincial government, which is controlled by a coalition of pro-Taliban religious parties, would bear blame for attacks after the deadline.

Bhatti also urged Muslim religious scholars to condemn the threats and said the federal government should take "concrete steps to provide protection" to Christians.

Asif Daudzai, a spokesman for the provincial government, asked Christians not to panic, saying authorities were doing all they could to ensure their protection.

"Christians are our brothers and sisters, and we will not allow any one to harm them," he told The Associated Press.

Christians, Hindus, Sikhs and other religious minorities make up about 3 percent of Pakistan's 160 million residents.

Most live peacefully alongside the Muslim majority, although the groups have been targeted repeatedly in attacks blamed on extremists since the country allied itself with the United States after the Sept. 11, 2001, attacks.

Islamic radicals trying to impose Taliban-style social edicts in northwestern Pakistan are growing bolder, bombing shops selling Western films, threatening barbers for trimming beards and warning hotels to remove televisions from guest rooms.

Minorities and secular opposition parties say the government is doing too little to counter the "Talibanization" of growing swaths of the country.

happy mom day.

i love my mom much.

i am so thankful for the chance to live at home again for a few months last year.
i saw her servants heart.
her love for her family.
her love for her coworkers. an amazing Godly example in the workplace.

instead of being frustrated that she's not more 'kingdom minded'.... while living at home i was humbled to realize that she embodies Christ's love more than i.

she gave her life to her family. she loved me and my sister greatly. i was never without want...either physically or emotionally. i never doubted i was loved. she was always there for me. not overpowering, but...there. what a mom. honestly...perhaps one of the best mom's i know. i love her. i am thankful for her in my life. praise God for good health....6+ years cancer free.

we do birthdays....

birthdays...are a special time. when fond memories are made. our friend faith had a difficult time in childhood playing this game. she very much wanted to redeem herself...but, lorin and i would not have it. faith believed the donkey to be on his legs and not his head. a classic faith reaction occured a few seconds after this fabulous shot was taken.
lorin didn't need her car anymore. so, we took it. and put this one in its place. i think it looks much like it....don't you? then we played an inventful game where she must ask questions to determine the location of her car. grand.... lorin's eye is peeping out of the car. a safe assumption is this little prank war is far from over. sigh.


i pretty much like california. i'll get my official paper tomorrow to confirm this reality.

do everyone a favor...and be honest.
stop using your words as an excuse.
if you care...show it.
if you say you're open....be it.
if you love me....show me.
if you want to hear me....listen.
you only fool yourself.
and one day you'll find yourself alone.
and no one picking up the phone to listen.
what will you do then?
stop running.
and be honest.

interesting.

king herod the great found?

i have been missing my friend daniel. i can't believe i actually worked there. it was a great job. i nearly got a job out here working w/ students such as daniel. after working w/ daniel i am fairly certain i could handle anything. he was a handful. i post pictures now...b/c not too many people look at my site. and, my heart wants to share w/ those who care the adorableness of this child. i love him. pray for him and his family. i pray they would find something to help him calm his mind...and give his parents a peace of heart. we think we have troubles in our lives. pssh. hardly. but, what a joy too! i loved this kid. i do love this kid. i don't easily stop loving.


inquistive little kid. adorable. you can't tell his ability to produce salivia from this picture...



fantastic shot of him outside on this sit and spin thing. he would want me to spin him. so, i would agree. unless he spit on me. he was nice to me usually b/c he liked to spin. i didn't mind b/c at least he was secluded and not able to harm the other kids.



This was a dangerous position....b/c his hands were near my face. he liked to poke and scratch me. but, he also liked to hug me. i took them. i loved this kid w/ all my heart.




This is when we were really connecting at the end of my time. This was our designated corner. See that blue thing on the desk? i think he threw it across the room after this photo was taken.
oh..and if you look on the blackboard you can see remanents of 'mattman.' catchy little song which helped max learn how to draw a person!

sweeeeet

innocence lost....

and for this reason, i am sad.