life.

much to say. creativity is lacking currently and so i hesitate to blog. (is this what you do? 'blog'? do you call it 'blogging' when you're actually putting up a post? what's the correct use of this word?) why do i ask so many questions? sometimes i think i should stop asking questions because the answers don't really matter. perhaps the answers don't matter, but i think the process to arrive at the answer matters greatly.

it was my mom's birthday this weekend so i spent significant time w/ everyone the past two days. i love my family. i asked my mother what the best part of her past year. abbie of course was the first thing and second was that i am living at home. it meant much that she mentioned my living at home as a highlight. maybe this period of my life isn't about me. (not that it ever is). this isn't where i wanted to be or thought i would be this year. but it's been surprisingly awesome. i want to make the most of the next few months i am home. i have been swamped as of late with much homework. but i realized if i am stressed this shouldn't seep out in the way i treat others. maybe some stuff won't get done...but relationships are way more important than many other things. i feel so loved living at home. i know my mom is excited to get off work and come home to ME. and i am really not even that fun! she insists that i am but moms must say things like this.

i feel just full tonight of love.
of blessings in my life.
i am content.
i am happy.
i am at peace.
i still have longings and still sad at times.
but, overwhelming at peace with God.
free.