thanks.

i don't know how many people read this.
but, i felt prayed for. today was a much better day.
i felt like last night was another turn around in my life.
i want to believe truth....and not get wrapped up and consumed by things which don't matter. i don't want to cut my heart off from feeling things deeply. i'm not upset about 'loosing' the relationship... i have been hurt cuz i feel God took it away from me. why? can i trust God's protection in this? that he desire the best for me? for his name and renown which i say i desire? but...really...how ultimately i want what i want. dang.

may God continue to change my heart. i laughed and joked w/ my family tonight like i haven't in a long time. i felt more free to be myself. my old goofy, immature, silly self. i enjoy laughing. screw this serious crap. i want to laugh and enjoy the freedom i have in life!